Today I introduce America's New Favorite Running Blog Event, "I'm Flummoxed!" In this series, I will post, usually briefly but occasionally in long-wind format, an issue or question presently confusing, perplexing, bemusing, baffling, or bothering me and seek the assistance of my friends and vague acquaintances to find an answer to this issue.
(Also, on this particular occasion, this will get me out of the spot immediately above Dallas' Seldom Updated Blog on the Businessman's "Blogs I Like," whereby convincing me that I'm an active and valuable blogerator.)
So, today's flummoxment: Why do middle-aged women (and usually overweight ones at that) find it necessary or reasonable to wear shirts with current day children's characters on them?
The other day I went to the bank and walked past a larger woman of probably 55 years or so waddling her way along the sidewalk wearing a black sweatshirt with a 12-inch or so furry Elmo on it, and, just in case someone misses the quasi-iconic character, "ELMO" in text. Is she really a big Elmo fanatic? Does she own Elmo season tickets?
(A fine line: my mother kind of does this, but it doesn't count as Bad American Behavior because the character she supports is Snoopy, of whom she has been a fan for a very, very long time. Garfield, Mickey Mouse, etc. would then by extension also be a permitted character, the principle being that if the character was around when the individual was a child, you're OK. Elmo came about in 1972, at which point this woman would have been at least 16-20 years old, ergo she does not receive the exception) (Also my mother is exempt from this as she is a lovely and wonderful woman, and I would never have any complaint or question about anything she chose to do) (Put THAT on greeting card! Good son points for me!)
So, discuss and post amongst yourselves. I may or may not blog again until I receive sufficient responses, thereby placing the onus on persons other than myself to hold up the "Jeff is an active and valuable blogerator" test.
About Me
- The Goob
- I do science. I watch movies. I read books. And magazines. And the internet. I eat a disproportionate amount of cheese.
2 comments:
I've also found it curious that not only do overweight women wear modern characters upon their chest, but the shirts are ALWAYS one or two sizes too small. I know the women in question are big, but I'm big. I find clothes that fit me. I think the reasoning for all this lies in one of the tree reasons:
-Poor, overweight women can't afford television but manage to continue having child after child. It is well known that large people cannot predict the preciseness of body jiggles. Thus they buy Elmo t's, squeeze into them, and jiggle away. The moving character on the shirt is just like the moving character on the TV Uncle Bob has. The children are amused.
-Amongst overweight, trashy women a subculture of popularity exists. The cool ones wear Elmo t's. The not so cool ones where the cheaper alternatives--like that little yellow creature from Sesame Street that came out three years after the Tickle Me Elmo craze. The shirts are a status symbol--gang colors if you will.
-Once anyone reaches a certain level of obesity (in this case-level three), the person obvoiusly stops caring about their appearance. Because of social ostracization and because of fat cells riddling their brains, the overweight women contingent grows bitter at the rest of the humanity. "Look at Mr. Fancy Pants in his jeans and polo!" the overweight person shouts. The other overweight people laugh. That middle-class citizen should feel ashamed of himself for not wanting to look like he is wearing pajamas all the time. Because the overweight people could care less about what you or I think about them, they start wearing non-traditional clothing in an attempt to damn the man. They showed us!
I believe the issue stems from a misunderstanding on the part of the overweight gal based on the body language she picks up from everyone around her when she leaves her hammock in the double-wide to go in public either at K-Mart or iHop.
As she hobbles around on foot or via Rascal, she sees people looking at her. You know you stop and stare, and if you're with someone else, you might whisper something to them. I do it too. You come up with questions like, "Why would she wear Elmo on her shirt?" or "Spandex sure is stretchy, isn't it?" Through her glandular vision, she thinks she is dead sexy. Her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, so she keeps doing it. She found success with her Elmo and Kathy shirt, so she continues to flaunt what she got, two sizes too small. Other people see her successes and follow suit. It spreads like a plague.
Or it might be corporate Go America discovered these characters play well to a plus sized crowd and simply market XXXL (still two sizes too small) to this minority consumer and sell them like gangbusters.
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